: But Even Better...
subject: Recent Playtest of Fuckwit (promise you'll post to hate mail! lol)
Scrolling through your hate mail page, I came across the following reply you created for someone:
fuckwit the roleplaying gameSuffice to say, I eagerly started developing the setting for my first gaming session of Fuckwit.
FUCKWIT, the first playtest
Character creation was fairly difficult at first, primarily because there was more than one step. Also, I have no idea what an RPG is. Which I didn't originally think would be a problem for interpretting what your site was about. Apparently it was.
I rolled a 4. Combined with the compulsory 90, I had a total character sheet that looked like this:
Next, I began my first scene. There was little in there about scene framing, so I did some background research. I decided to set my campaign in an entirely new and unique setting.
So, my character was surfing AOL, trying to find out more about puppies. Because I assume, with a fuckwititude of 93, my character loves puppies and God and all things that are pretty and can be taken at face value.
And then I came across "Kill Puppies For Satan". I knew this site would contain nothing about puppy care, so my character decided to avoid the site. However, I rolled a 91 on my resolution roll, failing to avoid clicking every link on the page without rhyme or reason.
Rolling the additional fuckwititude result, I realized that I would have to send you a "Why do you hate puppies" email. Not yet knowing your address, I decided to bank that result for later.
Once on your site, the ability for indepth roleplaying expanded immensely. My character, being a fucking moron, was horrified by the messages of satanism. Plus, it didn't help that the website didn't have a cool background or a thousand flashing lights.
I rolled to attempt to... you know...exercise personal control and leave the site. I got a total of 12, well under my fuckwititude score of 96. In addition, I rolled a 96 on the random fuckwititude result page (meaning reroll twice). I scored a 77, and an 82.
In total, this meant that my character needed to send you 3 (!!!) messages about puppies.
I decided to try and create a diversity of character here, so I did something a little different in each letter:
-Subject: I hate u. y u hav to be sooooo mean? Puppies are niece. Ure a bad person.
Go leave the planet 4ever.
-Subject: FUCK YOU ASSMUNCHER. You munch ass like an assmuncher. Go die or something.
bitch. FUCKER FUCKER FUCKER FUCKER.
-Subject: I love puppies. I love puppies. Puppies have cute eyes. Why would you
kill something adorable? I love puppies. and I HATE YOU! You ga* fa**ot.
I awarded myself a bonus point of fuckwititude for each email (something which was missing from the game: character progression!) and felt that this was a good place to end the session.
A very rewarding game overall. Cheers.
Thank you, playtester of fuckwit the roleplaying game! You made my day.
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