anyway.



thread: 2007-09-15 : Frankly disgusted

On 2007-10-09, Julia wrote:

You bring up some interesting points, Judd. I want to address #2 specifically:

I want constructive feedback for my game so that I can improve it. I've received a great deal of constructive feedback, and a great deal of shitty and unhelpful feedback, much of which seems to come from people wanting to be nice, but not wanting to be honest with me. If someone says, "This game sounds so awesome, amazing, interesting, but I don't think I'd ever want to play it," I'm left wondering where I lost the person. When I see something awesome, amazing, and interesting, I want to engage it. When I've had the chance to get more from people who have said this, I have found that it sometimes stems from a white person's fear and discomfort with "getting black people wrong" or having to confront their racism. Surprise, surprise, my game's not just about that. It may be there in the subtext (Hey you, gamer who is statistically most likely white and male, come play a black slave) Those assumptions come from the reader of the game who doesn't read it without judgement, or from the person who reads his inaccurate summation of the objective of the game.

Certainly, sometimes people see amazing, awesome things, and they just want to look at them from afar. That's totally okay. Different strokes for different folks, and those folks are missing out on the amazing awesome they identified but never touched.

If the reluctance comes from someone's inaccurate assumptions about what the game is about, who the game is written for, and where they can go with the game, I want to clarify either in the text or on a forum. I need that feedback.

I am new to game design. If people want to be helpful, they can give me feedback on the design and mechanics of the game, regardless of the subject matter. If my game has been written off for reasons that aren't really accurate, I'm screwed. I get no feedback, other than some people read what's not there because they either want it to be there, or they're afraid it's actually there.

Steal Away Jordan asks a few things of the players:
To play a survivor, not a victim, to play a marginalized character in a time period that many people in the US can't seem to honestly come to terms with, and to make up a well rounded playable character. If you play a person not a stereotype, not a victim, you don't have to deal directly with that frightening time period's baggage. If that's not what people are into, so be it. Don't play my game.
I ask for similar things when people give me feedback: that you give feedback honestly, read the game with a critical eye, read what's there, don't read into it. And if you must deal with me the game designer, deal with me the game designer, not something you're afraid to offend.

My experience in dealing with some people who aren't used to speaking or dealing with people of color is that they're overly friendly, and terrified of saying the wrong thing. Lest I suddenly go from being just that hippie chick Julia to that black woman Julia whose feelings we don't want to hurt. In these instances, I am treated as a composite and often fantasy-based amalgamation of person of different ethnic descent rather than just plain old hippie chick Julia (who would much rather talk about game design than race). I experienced some of this at GenCon, even with all the positive buzz. I couldn't help feel some of that in that thread. It's incredibly frustrating, and causes me to throw tantrums and call people wusses. How do you feel when you are misunderstood, even about things you've said quite plainly, but they weren't what people want to hear?

As for point #3—By all means, but effing dismiss outright and don't add a footnote of a feeble reason why you're dismissing because you thought the game designer was a nice person. Make no assumptions about my kindness. Dismiss and move on.



 

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